I've decided to keep this pregnancy a secret from my extended family and friends for as long as possible. (I'm pretty sure that few, if any, of them read this blog. They think my health practices are a little eccentric to say the least.) I really want to tell a few friends who I know would be happy for me and supportive of it. However, at my age I realize that most people would be horrified to learn I was pregnant again. That's sad, but it's a part of our culture. Of course, considering how fast my tummy begins to protrude with each subsequent pregnancy, it may become obvious pretty fast. Nevertheless, I am determined to keep my happy little secret for as long as possible. I also want to keep my "bubble of peace" as strong and intact as possible.
When I showed my husband the pregnancy test I had a sudden and very determined thought that I was not going to allow anything negative to enter my mind about this pregnancy. I know that's easier said than done but so far so good! I feel that thought came from a higher source and I will do my best to follow it. I believe it's extremely important to my having a healthy, joyous pregnancy and birth.
When DH saw the test he closed his eyes and gave a little sigh, like "here we go again." But then he motioned for me to lie down next to him and told me he was genuinely happy and that he loved me. I know he was sincere. Although at times, I'm sure he wants to complain or make jokes about attending this child's high school graduation while walking with a cane, he refrains from doing that. He told me that the spirit has told him to accept it and grow with it. One thing about him I can say for certain: when he feels the spirit is telling him something, he obeys! I love that about him.
My son, Joshua, who is 6, almost 7, came into my room shortly after I found out and I was so excited I asked him to read the test (it was the ClearBlue brand that actually shows the word "pregnant") He didn't know what the word meant so I told him it means I have a baby in my tummy. His eyes got huge and he said "YES!" Later on he excitedly told his dad that "mom has a baby in her tummy!" He told him, "I know! I put it there!" I'm not sure what he thought about that....
When I told 4 year old Charles, he said with total astonishment, "Another one?" That was classic. I'm not really sure what my older kids think for sure. I think they are maybe not as enthusiastic as Joshy, knowing that it means potentially more work for them. I think my daughters are a little concerned I may be pregnant at their weddings. (Although neither are engaged right now.)
At any rate, I'm feeling great. The only pregnancy symptoms I have are having to pee all the time and a little fatigue in the late afternoon. I have energy, I am eating right--with a greater motivation than ever to do so--and absolutely love taking my walks up the canyon while listening to my "Joyful Pregnancy" affirmations. In fact I did that the morning I found out. It was just as wonderful and empowering and positive as I remembered. I love it!